Chapter 7: God on the Dock

In chapter 7, "God on the Dock," Jesus and Sarayu (the Holy Spirit) return to the kitchen to help Papa serve dinner. Jesus drops a bowl of something, spilling its messy contents everywhere, and the three begin to laugh almost uncontrollably. When their laughing subsides, Jesus proceeds to gather a basin of water and a towel, and kneels at Papa's feet to wash them. Mack wonders internally:

So this was God in relationship? It was so beautiful and so appealing...what [is] truly important here was the love they had for one another and the fullness it brought them...How different this was from the way he sometimes treated the ones he loved!

After they have cleaned up from dinner,  Jesus invites Mack outside to look at the stars. Mack remembers the last time he did this was the camping trip. But, what the heck, he decides. Jesus and Mack lie down on the dock next to the lake behind the cabin. They are silent for a few moments, then Jesus expresses His wonder at the beauty of the stars. Mack is confused, wondering how Jesus could be acting like this is the first time He has seen the stars. Jesus replies, "...even though I created this, I see it now as human. And I must say, it is impressive!"

Mack expresses his comfort around Jesus, his observation that Jesus seems different from the other two. Papa isn't at all what he expected from God, and he doesn't know what to think about Sarayu. Jesus says in response, "I am the best way any human can relate to Papa or Sarayu. To see me is to see them. The love you sense from me is no different from how they love you."

They continue this track of the conversation for a while. They somehow get to the topic of how Mack really doesn't know Jesus, or Papa, or Sarayu. Mack says, "It would be a lot easier if we could always talk like this." Jesus says, "...don't think that just because I'm not visible, our relationship has to be less real. It will be different, but perhaps even more real...My purpose from the beginning was to live in you and you in me...It requires that a very real dynamic and active union exists."

They continue talking, and even get to the point of laughing together, at which point Jesus reaches out and hugs Mack, who "felt more clean and alive and well that he had since...well, he couldn't remember when." Mack begins to feel guilty about being happy, and The Great Sadness begins to descend upon him in full force once again. Crying, he admits how lost he feels.

Jesus responds, "I know, Mack. But it's not true. I am with you and I'm not lost. I'm sorry it feels that way, but hear me clearly: you are not lost."

Wouldn't it be nice if we could hear the voice of Almighty God directly responding to our questions, fears, requests, our prayers, joys, sorrows, praises, and thanksgivings? It sure would. I find myself often battling with whose voice I am actually hearing in response to these things. Is it God's? The enemy's? My own? Someone else's? And with all these voices telling me different things, and all sounding frustratingly similar, however am I to discern from the masses the still, small voice that belongs to God? This is something I struggle with daily, something I pray for guidance for often. I wish I had the answer. I wish someone had the answer. I wish I could tie it up in a nice little bow. But I can't. I can, however, come before God in prayer, asking His help in this discernment. With practice and His divine guidance, I'm confident that I will one day hear His voice louder, sweeter, and more comforting than all the rest put together.